Monday, May 13, 2013

Confessions of a really bad housewife...

I like to think that while Jeremy's gone working that I'm "holding down the fort" and making my best efforts to fill the roles of both parents. Some days after Jensen goes to sleep I look around at my clean(ish) house and think to myself, "Hmm, not too shabby". Today...was not that kind of day. 

The truth is, there are some things that my silly little woman's brain just can not understand. For example: the sprinkler. I'm not sure if its a mechanical issue (seriously, how many options and buttons can there be on one sprinkler?!) or if its my pitiful spacial reasoning skills. You know that career inventory that you are given in 8th grade that helps give insight into what your future holds? I failed the spacial planning section if that helps you in the visual I'm about to provide.

I had already thoroughly sprayed the house, front door, cars, and several passing cars when I finally figured out how to get the sprinkler to work in the front yard. So Jensen and I took a lovely walk around the neighborhood while it watered the front. When we come back I had Jensen in the stroller on the patio and I was talking to my mom on the phone. I moved the sprinkler to the backyard and was  admiring my handy work  (hmmm, not too shabby). As I am about to move it again, I walk right into the jet stream of water...soaking my hair, face, jacket. I am laughing so hard I scare Jensen and he starts crying. Trying to get to him quickly, I just shove the sprinkler in the ground and put him in the house but leave the backdoor open. As I'm sitting him down on the floor, I hear the sprinkler coming around the side of the house. Jensen has decided to to to crawl at light speed and is blocking the door with his body so I can't close it before water shoots him and directly into my house! It was like a car wreck that is happening in slow motion...I just could stop it! I almost peed my pants I was laughing so hard!! I don't know what I said to my mom but I hung up with her to tend to a screaming Jensen and my soaking wet house.

On the bright side: I got to do an impromptu mopping of the kitchen and dining room floors (super fun), I got to put on a fabulously funny show for my neighbors and laugh hysterically at myself (and then laugh all over again as I write this!). 

The moral of the story is brain must really be smaller. Ron Burgundy was right, its science. 

Hope you all have a wonderful night =)

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